FRANÇOIS AUSTRIA-HUNGARY (BRAZIL)

Name: François Austria-Hungary (Brazil)
Occupation: Human Pinball / Fork / LOOSER (than the rest) / Ape-Man Extraordinaire

TONY KAPOWZA (PLASTIC BAG)

Name: Tony Kapowza (Plastic Bag)
Occupation: Jehova's Testifier / Sex God

FLAPJACK PETERS

Name: Flapjack Peters
Occupation: King of his own island (in his house) / Informant for Mr. Ed / Guy

SAMUEL "KINDOF" MASTURBATIONSON

Name: Samuel "Kindof" Masturbationson
Occupation: Firecracker! / Army Guy / The guy who made up the name for bread

SIGNOR ALIXJONES

Name: Signor Alixjones
Occupation: Condescending Pretty Boy / Creator of the show, "Shut Up and Dance!"

ERNEST "OPAQUE" ÉTATSGÉNÉRAUX

Name: Ernest "opaque" Étatsgénéraux
Occupation: Rental Sweatshop Worker / Whore / Serial Rapist / Cereal Rapist

OSCAR "PERMANENTÉ" BREWS

Name: Oscar "Permanenté" Brews
Occupation: Buonannologist / Pees on sleeping middle aged men

ISMAEL

Name: Ismael
Occupation: Motivational Babbler / Crotchety Old Dude

WIR TANZEN

Name: Wir Tanzen
Occupation: Bike Seat-Sniffer / Dunkin' Donut / Nutcracker / Pac Man / Mark Twain / Huck Finn / Lolli-pop

GUS DAMMITT (RECYCLE)

Name: Gus Dammitt (Recycle)
Occupation: Male Actor / Investigator of the effects of child molestation ---> It gives him a perfect alibi!

FATS DEEEEMONICK

Name: Fats DEEEEmonick
Occupation: YO! / Distasteful Rationer of Socks / Dick Stickler

MILLENNIUM JOE

Name: Millennium Joe
Occupation: Creamed Sausage Boy / Former Narc / Activist for hair removal / Hair Stylist

ALVARO GOMBRÉZ

Name: Alvaro Gombréz
Occupation: Life Enthusiast / President of the "I Don't Want to Die" Society / Boring

PEABODY F. BESTUF

Name: Peabody F. Bestuf
Occupation: Ransom Note Writer (for cash) / Porn Collector (just for psychological studies)

ALIX DELIDIOTSOPHOMORE

Name: Alix DeLIdiotsophomore
Occupation: Inhaler of Burning Plastic Fumes / Masturbates with Melting Plastic / Authority Figure

BARNIE WAULKER

Name: Barnie Waulker
Occupation: Genocidal Pervert / Freelance Peeping Tom / Systematic Urine Gargler

FRANZ VANGOODGUY

Name: Franz VanGoodguy
Occupation: Sitcom Personality / Basement Dweller / Kisser of the Eleven Thieves / Scenester #017

FREDDY CONNER

Name: Freddy Conner
Occupation: Hitting Sticks with his face / Making Sweet Sweet Dams (with his face) / Dam Maker (face)

RICK RHYMES

Name: Rick Rhymes
Occupation: Krispy Kreme Maker / Messenger of Death / Massager of Death

HOWIE RONALDSON

Name: Howie Ronaldson
Occupation: Soul Train Conductor

KOJACK

Name: Kojack
Occupation: Pixie-Stick Fiend / Seductress

P. DIDDY STEWART

Name: P. Diddy Stewart
Occupation: Dancer of Various Jigs

FRANK "THE DEHYDRATOR" SAMPSON

Name: Frank "The Dehydrator" Sampson
Occupation: Masturbationist / Security Guard

VLADIMIR SANCHAIRO (MORALITY)

Name: Vladimir SanChairo (Morality)

Occupation: Light Bulb Screwer / Eater of Various Fruits

BONUS!!!!!!!

Sometimes, the back of the plate will be adorned with something special! Think of it as a deeper look into the PLATEVERSE.

CHANDERS TOSTITOS

Name: Chanders Tostitos
Occupation: Bully / Draws on plates (Some plates draw on him!)

CARL EGDHOOVER

Name: Carl Egdhoover
Occupation: Unemployed

FRANZ "EDGARHIEMER" BIG-GUY

Name: Franz "Edgarhiemer" Big-Guy

Occupation: Living Joke / Motivational Speaker / Elvis Denier / Elvis' Son / Mega Man at Parties

JIMMY FRIENDSON

Name: Jimmy Friendson
Occupation: Sweat Gargler / Kid Befriender / Big Brother / YMCA Swim Instructor / Pedophile

J. EDGAR SHITFACEFUCKUP

Name: J. Edgar Shitfacefuckup
Occupation: Mathemagician Extraordinaire / John Gilder / Citizen Cayne / Mail-Order Fool

UNNAMED CHARACTER No. 2

--

DAN STORM (JUICE)

Name: Dan Storm (Juice)
Occupation: Groin Analyst / Model / Patriot / Producer of the largest magazine "Kids in Heat" and tapes of Gonads the Ballbarian.

FILL "HAMMER" PHILSON

!

Name: Fill "Hammer" Philson
Occupation: Banana Psychiatrist / Colonel of Inefficiency / Anger Enthusiast

RANDY PHONICS

Name: Randy Phonics
Occupation: Mail prostitute/ failed entrepreneur/ groin drainer

TISSUE PAPER

Name: Tissue Paper
Occupation: Scientologist/ karmacologist/ visual aide/ enlightener of youth

SERIAL CLOWNAGE

Name: Serial Clownage
Occupation: Frownist/ bad sandwich constructor

GREG A. CRAMDASS

Name: Greg A. Cramdass
Occupation: Morgue philanthropist/ vagina intriguer

UNNAMED CHARACTER No. 1

Yeah, I like this one.

SIMONE PELVICTHRUST

Name: Simone Pelvicthrust
Occupation: Nitrous addict/ Scheißnehmer/ norseman/ totalitär

DICK ITCHES

Name: Dick Itches
Occupación: Founder of "Bangin' Enterprises"

LIGHT ABOVE THE REST

Name: Light Above The Rest
Occupation: Discusser of You! / Previous deliberater

"CRUCIAL" SLIP

Name: "Crucial" Slip
Occupation: Compaq PC specialist/ state namer/ chrondrologist/ fixer upper

VINNY HUNDO

Name: Vinny Hundo
Occupation: Mediocker (he makes things mediocre)

ASHLEY PETE

Name: Ashley Pete
Occupation: Fellow pornographer/ Eskimo culture enthusiast/ ticket scalper/ trashcan

RED STRYPE

Name: Red Strype
Occupation: Materialistic tea kettler/ glass sucker

MARIO JABLIZIO

Name: Mario Jablizio
Occupation: Career boner analyst/ superior chieftain/ balls massager/ potpourri enthusiast

SCHTICK VON DEM BLEISTIFT

Name: Schtick Von Dem Bleistift
Occupation: Guidance Counselor/ the fifth teletubbie

BILL POPSWORTH

Coming up next: Is your life just great? A new study shows that it just might be!

Name: Bill Popsworth
Occupation: Child Psychiatrist and Daycare Supporter

"ORVWALD" LARRY PIPES (SIN)

I ain't laughin'.

Name: "Orvwald" Larry Pipes (Sin)
Occupation: Family Photographer (Holidays) / Sincere Child Lover / Sits in a Child's Playground with a Camera

ARTHUR RUHTRA

What can I say? Life ain't fair, but it sure is fucking hilarious.

Name: Arthur Ruhtra
Occupation: Worker at the Ministry of Harassment / Hypocrite / Human Boner / Blatant Pedophile